Getting Out of the Friend Zone – Know Thine Enemy

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Alright, so you look the part. Let’s roll out for a test drive.getting out of the friend zone

Let’s say you look your best now; you’ve all worked on the smile, the body, and the style. Now you boys are new to this. I’m gonna impart another disclaimer here. Having game means being flexible with your morals. I hope that all of you, at your core, are good people.

However, I learned the hard way that nice guys do finish last.

To hell with placating niceties and acceptable behavior  My way to have game means to not be phased by rejection or bad results.

The best way to build tolerance is not to be an asshole per se, but to be someone without guilt.

But I digress…

Now, all of you have had that one female friend that you wanted to date. All of you. Do not deny it. It’ll be our dark secret.

Let’s ponder the ultimate question: can heterosexual men and women ever be “just friends”? Few other questions have provoked debates as intense, family dinners as awkward, or movies as memorable. Still, the question remains unanswered.

Getting Out of the Friend Zone

get out of friend zone

Daily life experience suggests that non-romantic friendships between males and females are not only possible, but common—men and women live, work, and play side-by-side, and generally seem to be able to avoid spontaneously sleeping together.

Bull. This apparently platonic coexistence is merely a façade, an elaborate dance covering up countless sexual impulses bubbling just beneath the surface. We may think that we are capable, but the idea of “romance” is often lurking just around the corner, waiting to pounce at the most inopportune moment.

And it’s usually the male who suffers.

Imagine (or more likely, recall) the fallout if two friends learned that one—and only one—had unspoken romantic feelings for the other throughout their relationship.

Unspoken.

Even if it were blatantly obvious, as long as it remains unspoken women will play relationship chicken with you.

Blind to the Obvious

Take my anecdotal findings with a grain of salt. I’m perfectly fine with talking to both genders, and have good friends in both. We’ve had serious discussions, and here’s what I’ve found. There are huge, mothaf***in’ differences in how men and women experience opposite-sex friendships.

Men were much more attracted to their female friends than vice versa. (Oh the shock). Men were also more likely than women to think that their opposite-sex friends were attracted to them—a clearly misguided belief. I must replace “think” with “hopeful”.

early dating mistakes

Men have this… compromising mechanism about their own overall character.

For example, to boost their confidence, men think of statements such as “I’m not tall but I’m funny”, or “I may not drive a fancy car but I can cook very well”, or even statements such as “My penis is huge despite all my faults”.

Men build up their strong points and blithely believe that it is enough to attract women. Fail.

Therefore how men estimate how attractive they are to their female friends have virtually nothing to do with how women actually feel, and almost everything to do with how the men themselves feel. Basically, men are stupid.

Men wrongly assume that any romantic attraction they experienced was mutual, and were blind to the actual level of romantic interest felt by their female friends.

Stop Beating Around the Bush

Women are jerks in the reverse sense. No matter how obvious the dude peacocks or communicates indirectly women pretend to be blind to the mindset of their opposite-sex friends.

escape the friend zone

The general agreement between women for why this happens is this: Because females generally were not attracted to their male friends, they assumed that this lack of attraction was mutual. (Seriously?)

Don’t you all see the problem here?

Lack of direct communication. Silly people will spend years pussyfooting around the topic, and women in return will pretend to dance.

First rule of the ‘game’ – Communicate directly.

No to the weak, friend zoning statements like, “hey we should hang out”, or “Wanna watch a movie together?”, or even the sad, sad text messages to each other punctuated by constant “LOLs”.

None of that.

Notice I didn’t say “tell her directly how you feel”. I said communicate.

Communicate with your whole body. Sit square to her, give her your full attention, and smile in a way that shows how great you feel around her.

Are you one of those weak boys who can’t seem to hang out with the girl you like one on one and need a group to diffuse the tension? Use it to your advantage. Have your whole body square to the girl so that you completely ignore what’s behind you.

This will be rude to people around you. Like I said at the beginning, no guilt. There must be no guilt.

Invade her space. Get close, get cozy.

Tip #1 from the fanged Badass

Find reasons to pull her close. Give her a smile, pull on the sleeve of her shirt so she’s close to you, lean in next to her ear as close as possible, and whisper, “That guy doesn’t know that his zipper is open” (or some other equally funny quote).

Key point: linger next to her ear. Linger, and laugh ever so softly next to her ear so your breath tickles. And during this whole time, your hand has not yet let go of her sleeve.

When you break apart, make it as slow as you can. Then when your heads cross, look her right in the eyes and smile, not saying anything. And then let go.

Article written by fanged Badass

Getting Out of the Friend Zone - Know Thine Enemy, 4.9 out of 5 based on 30 ratings

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